(Whispered voice of narrator):
From June 2 to 10, we are sending Stephanie to work in the U.S. Capital of Washington, DC. Because Stephanie lived and worked in DC from 1997-2002, when she was still wholly American, this nine day period will provide an interesting pilot test for her planned re-integration assignment. Watch along with us as the significantly modified Stephanie attempts to fit it with past friends and new co-workers.
Will she be able to assimilate new vocabulary such as "fierce" and remember that Americans no longer say "No, thank you," but instead respond to offers by saying "I'm good"? Will she be able to consume the "half-size" restaurant portions which are clearly still far more than any one person needs to eat? Will she be able to smile, for absolutely no reason, at everyone around her, ALL the time, in order to convince the other Americans that she is really one of them?
Will she start to remember how to read all the social clues in this society which was once her own, or will she continue to feel like the kid on the playground who can't play the game because she doesn't remember the rules and has no one to explain them to her?
How many people will notice that regular Stephanie has been replaced with partly French Stephanie, and which one will they prefer?
P.S. Stephanie's Mom is having back surgery today, so please think good thoughts for her.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
This would make such an excellent reality television series. Let's start plans for a pilot episode. I'm going to work on a title, because Native Observation is way too subtle for VH1.
Okay, first of all, "Fierce" is already over, so I wouldn't recommend pulling that word out unless you're doing it ironically.
Second, don't forget that when you get to Minnesota later this summer that we have even more strange rules here. For instance, when someone offers you something (like a free meal, or a cute pug) you can't just accept it. You must first turn them down to signify that you're not worthy of their gift. Now, if you're dealing with a native Minnesotan they'll want to repeat this offer/refuse cycle 3 times and only on the 3rd time are you allowed to accept. (Unless you really don't want the pug, in which case you should continue to say no.) If you're dealing with a non-native then a single refusal will do.
I would highly recommend a crash course into the Minnesota psyche by listening to as many episodes of Garrison's show as soon as possible. Like Goodall's observations of the chimps, this radio show offers an insider's perspective of a strange but lovable culture.
On the subject of eWAC's comment, the authoritative text - How To Talk Minnesotan, by Howard Mohr - should be required reading for all transplants to this quirky state. It's a quick read and I'd highly recommend it, lest you be lured into having "a little lunch" for three hours, or the progressive 15-minute/5-stage "goodbye".
We can't have ya coming here and getting all confused, now, can we now? Ooh, noo. That'd just not be very polite.
To Eric M and Meema: please keep in mind that I grew up in MN and am thus fluent in several of the local dialects. Also remember, however, that there are reasons that I left the upper Midwest. Sometimes, for example, I actually say what I think: on more than one occasion in my life, I have said, "I don't like that," instead of using the proper Minnesota syntax of "Well, that's differ'nt." I'm also trying to develop some type of virus that I'll be able to release into the air or water supply to make strangers stop wanting to talk to me while waiting in line at the store.
To Scott: A reality show? Intriguing. How do you envision the format? Would there be contestants competing for the right to be me, or would that just be too pie-in-the-sky for most people to hope for? Or (be honest), do you see yourself as the life-expert who quietly observes for a few days, then swoops in and gives me lessons on how to be a better me?
Obviously, I've been planning a film on my life for many years now (this blog is just the latest version of the script), using the working title "My Life Is Based on a True Story" (which I blatantly plagiarized from my friend B at Concordia). But a reality show, that's a new idea. Please tell more.
Here's a welcome home hint: the (only) way to get substantial news on France (or pretty much any other country besides our own) once you are home is to wake up at 2:00 in the morning and not be able to sleep, thus forcing you to turn on the radio and listen to BBC on MPR.
Seriously, I know you are mentally aware of the lack of international news available here, but I'm not sure you are emotionally prepared for the astonishing us-centric culture that awaits.
I'm not proud, I'm just sayin'.
Post a Comment