- This is the first time I'll be able to vote in person on election day since, I think, 1998. In 2000, I was on a work trip in North Africa, and I was in France for the 2002, 2004, and 2006 elections. I voted by absentee ballot in all these elections, and I always did what I could to get out the ex-pat vote in Paris--my American friends there can attest that I hand-delivered Federal Emergency Absentee Ballots to friends who didn't receive their home state absentee ballots in time for the 2004 election--but it's hard to be surrounded by foreigners when the fate of your home country, and really, the world as we know it, is hanging in the balance. The Washington Post summed up my feelings pretty well in this article: The Prized Token of Sticking Together on Election Day.
- This is the first time I'll be able to vote for Congressional representatives since 1996, when I lived in New York. In 1997, I moved to the District of Columbia, which was then considered my "home" for voting purposes while I was in France. On this Election Day, please take a moment to ponder the inherent injustice of the over half million American citizens who pay taxes and go to war for our government yet have no Congressional representation--no Representative in the House; no Senators--simply because they reside in our nation's capital. If you think that DC is too small to have its own representative and senators, please bear in mind that the population of DC is larger than that of Wyoming and close to that of Vermont, North Dakota, and Alaska. I'll write more about this another time.
- I get to vote for a former writer for Saturday Night Live for Senator. I'm voting for him because he has political positions which I support; the fact that he wrote a book called Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot is just icing on the cake.
- Americans have the right to vote. I literally get choked up whenever I stop to think about how precious this right is, and how lucky we are to have this opportunity. If I needed reminding, one of my West African colleagues sent me an e-mail this morning saying he hopes I've voted already. The world really is counting on us today.
- I could go on and on, but now I need to get to my polling place and vote, in person, for the first time in 10 years. God Bless America.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
On Voting
Some random thoughts on why I'm so excited to go vote today:
Friday, October 31, 2008
Halloween Spookiness
Earlier today, I heated up some pita bread in my microwave. The microwave worked fine, and the pita was good, thanks for asking.
This evening, I decided to heat up a frozen main dish (much more satisfying than a frozen entrée, since that of course is only an appetizer). I opened the microwave door, put in the frozen item, closed the door, and the microwave came on. I thought, "Oh, I must have accidentally pressed a button when I closed the door; I'll have to press stop/clear and set it for the correct time." But the stop/clear button doesn't work, and neither do any of the other buttons. My microwave now seems to have only two settings: door open=off (with light on); door closed=on (with options for possibly exploding at any moment; I haven't left it running long enough to find out).
So I unplugged it (mercifully, it does turn off when unplugged, leaving some hope that the demons have not yet completely taken it over) and will apparently need to go buy a new microwave tomorrow. This makes me very sad, because I love my microwave very much--it has lots of cool settings, which they probably don't make any more. I assume that in post-modern America, one can only buy an iWave, which uses music to cook food and is not compatible for PC users.
And how did my microwave get broken from closing the door?! It's all very scary.
This evening, I decided to heat up a frozen main dish (much more satisfying than a frozen entrée, since that of course is only an appetizer). I opened the microwave door, put in the frozen item, closed the door, and the microwave came on. I thought, "Oh, I must have accidentally pressed a button when I closed the door; I'll have to press stop/clear and set it for the correct time." But the stop/clear button doesn't work, and neither do any of the other buttons. My microwave now seems to have only two settings: door open=off (with light on); door closed=on (with options for possibly exploding at any moment; I haven't left it running long enough to find out).
So I unplugged it (mercifully, it does turn off when unplugged, leaving some hope that the demons have not yet completely taken it over) and will apparently need to go buy a new microwave tomorrow. This makes me very sad, because I love my microwave very much--it has lots of cool settings, which they probably don't make any more. I assume that in post-modern America, one can only buy an iWave, which uses music to cook food and is not compatible for PC users.
And how did my microwave get broken from closing the door?! It's all very scary.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
American Again
I'm not sure if it's the water, the Diet Coke, or maybe just the air, but after four months back in the U.S. of A., my American consumerism gene has definitely been reactivated: today I bought a pack of Shamwows!
For the past few weeks, I've been bravely resisting the urge to dial the 800 number whenever the commercial for this amazing new product came on TV, but today I was in Target, and the boxes were right there, on the "Seen on TV" aisle endcap, calling out to me. I know for certain that this product was meant just for me, because:
For the past few weeks, I've been bravely resisting the urge to dial the 800 number whenever the commercial for this amazing new product came on TV, but today I was in Target, and the boxes were right there, on the "Seen on TV" aisle endcap, calling out to me. I know for certain that this product was meant just for me, because:
- The box contained not just 4 regular size Shamwows! but also, as a special bonus, 4 smaller Shamwows!, and the guy on TV said that this amazing offer was only available for people who called in the next 2 hours, because he couldn't give that kind of deal all day long. But he made it available just for me, at my local Target store.
- As I was standing there, studying the box (I'm not making this up), a woman walked past and whispered in my ear, "Those towels are great!" I'm not sure, but I think her eyes may have glowed red when she said it. (Okay . . . that last part, I made up.)
I haven't tried the Shamwow! yet, but when I do, I just know I'll say WOW everytime!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
On Winter Darkness
In a comment to my post yesterday, one of my ever-helpful readers suggested that I need to start getting ready for the "very long, very cold, very dark winter" in Minnesota. He's definitely right about the long and the cold, but some of you may be surprised to learn that Paris actually has fewer hours of daylight in the winter than Minnesota does. Why is this? If you study the map below or one like it, you may be able to find two reasons. (Native Observation: A Place for Learning!)
Apocalypse Soon
In an act which surely portends the End of the World, on September 30, I joined a gym. I apologize for not telling you sooner, but I rationalized that joining a gym is not the same as actually going to the gym, so there was no need to worry you unnecessarily.
But today, October 23 (24 days after joining)*, I went to the gym and engaged in actual physical activity for the first time. So you'll probably want to start getting your affairs in order and telling those close to you that you love them. Also, if someone could check in on me tomorrow and make sure that I can still move, that would be nice. Walking around the pool a couple of times really takes it out of a girl!
On the other hand, there were a couple of cute guys in the aqua aerobics class, so this working out thing might not be so bad after all. Strong emphasis on the might.
*In addition to all the stars aligning perfectly between my house and the gym today, my father's release from the hospital yesterday removed my oh-so-valid excuse of not being able to go to the gym because I always needed to be ready to race down to Mankato at any moment. "I can't possibly go somewhere where I'll get sweaty or be in water," I'd think. "No, it's best to stay at the ready here at home, sitting in my easy chair, watching another CSI marathon. With a box of Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies near at hand, for quick energy. Not to mention creamy numminess."**
**In a completely unrelated story, I somehow seem to have gained 10 pounds since I moved to Minnesota. I just can't figure out how that happened. It's an unsolved mystery, worthy of CSI!
But today, October 23 (24 days after joining)*, I went to the gym and engaged in actual physical activity for the first time. So you'll probably want to start getting your affairs in order and telling those close to you that you love them. Also, if someone could check in on me tomorrow and make sure that I can still move, that would be nice. Walking around the pool a couple of times really takes it out of a girl!
On the other hand, there were a couple of cute guys in the aqua aerobics class, so this working out thing might not be so bad after all. Strong emphasis on the might.
*In addition to all the stars aligning perfectly between my house and the gym today, my father's release from the hospital yesterday removed my oh-so-valid excuse of not being able to go to the gym because I always needed to be ready to race down to Mankato at any moment. "I can't possibly go somewhere where I'll get sweaty or be in water," I'd think. "No, it's best to stay at the ready here at home, sitting in my easy chair, watching another CSI marathon. With a box of Little Debbie Oatmeal Creme Pies near at hand, for quick energy. Not to mention creamy numminess."**
**In a completely unrelated story, I somehow seem to have gained 10 pounds since I moved to Minnesota. I just can't figure out how that happened. It's an unsolved mystery, worthy of CSI!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Tragedy and Triumph
My perusal of international flight timetables this evening* has revealed horrible news: as of October 1, Northwest Airlines has cancelled its direct flight between Minneapolis-St. Paul and Paris. The availability of this single direct pathway to my Nirvana was key to my decision to relocate to Minnesota. I was considering starting to unpack some boxes today, but I guess I'll have to wait a bit longer, since I might need to move back to Paris now.
I would bemoan at great length this dark cloud in my life, but after 40 days in the hospital, my dad got to go home today, and that rainbow outglows everything else right now.
*Isn't this what everyone does with their spare time? If not, please comment on your favorite time-wasters!
I would bemoan at great length this dark cloud in my life, but after 40 days in the hospital, my dad got to go home today, and that rainbow outglows everything else right now.
*Isn't this what everyone does with their spare time? If not, please comment on your favorite time-wasters!
Friday, October 10, 2008
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Minnesota Things
A few random observations after my first three months here:
1) They play a lot of Prince on the radio. (Those of you not from Minnesota should know that Prince is.)
2) "Minnesota Nice" is not just a myth.
- If someone so much as brushes against you when they pass you in a crowded store aisle, you get the kind of profuse apology that, in other places, you only get when someone runs over your puppy. (This probably explains why for the last 14 years in NY, DC, and Paris, it's made me so unreasonably angry when someone bumps into me without even saying "excuse me": here where I grew up, invading someone's personal space is practically a felony.)
- When you're driving, if you turn on a blinker to signal an upcoming lane change, the car in the next lane will often slow down to let you in. The other day, I was discussing this with my best friend from high school, who now lives in New York. We both agreed that at first, this phenomenon is so disconcerting that we didn't even change lanes, assuming that it could only be some kind of Machiavellian ploy on the part of the other driver.
3) There are many people of Scandinavian descent here.
- Long ago at my very Norwegian, very Lutheran college, a classmate shared a very funny anecdote of going to a wedding in New York. Most of the guests were what she described as mafioso types, and she said that a woman came up to her and complimented her hair, asking how she had it done. The classmate shrugged and told the woman it was just a normal bob, nothing special. The woman said, "No, I mean the color." When the classmate replied that the color was natural, the woman looked stunned and then said, "Where are you from?!" We all thought it was hilarious that someone couldn't believe that blond hair could be natural. Now I realize that with the possible exception of Stockholm, there are not this many natural blonds anywhere else in the world. This point was clearly emphasized to me a few weeks ago at my great-niece's volleyball game when I was having trouble finding her on the court. Her team had their backs to the spectators, and I realized that looking for the girl with a blond ponytail was not going to help me. At all.
- Also at the volleyball game, there was one girl that was wearing a different color t-shirt from the rest of the team. Instead of a number, it said "Ingalls" on the back, so I assumed she had lost her uniform and was wearing a souvenir shirt from a "Little House on the Prairie" play or something. Then I saw the front and realized it was just a different uniform, and that "Ingalls" was actually her name.
1) They play a lot of Prince on the radio. (Those of you not from Minnesota should know that Prince is.)
2) "Minnesota Nice" is not just a myth.
- If someone so much as brushes against you when they pass you in a crowded store aisle, you get the kind of profuse apology that, in other places, you only get when someone runs over your puppy. (This probably explains why for the last 14 years in NY, DC, and Paris, it's made me so unreasonably angry when someone bumps into me without even saying "excuse me": here where I grew up, invading someone's personal space is practically a felony.)
- When you're driving, if you turn on a blinker to signal an upcoming lane change, the car in the next lane will often slow down to let you in. The other day, I was discussing this with my best friend from high school, who now lives in New York. We both agreed that at first, this phenomenon is so disconcerting that we didn't even change lanes, assuming that it could only be some kind of Machiavellian ploy on the part of the other driver.
3) There are many people of Scandinavian descent here.
- Long ago at my very Norwegian, very Lutheran college, a classmate shared a very funny anecdote of going to a wedding in New York. Most of the guests were what she described as mafioso types, and she said that a woman came up to her and complimented her hair, asking how she had it done. The classmate shrugged and told the woman it was just a normal bob, nothing special. The woman said, "No, I mean the color." When the classmate replied that the color was natural, the woman looked stunned and then said, "Where are you from?!" We all thought it was hilarious that someone couldn't believe that blond hair could be natural. Now I realize that with the possible exception of Stockholm, there are not this many natural blonds anywhere else in the world. This point was clearly emphasized to me a few weeks ago at my great-niece's volleyball game when I was having trouble finding her on the court. Her team had their backs to the spectators, and I realized that looking for the girl with a blond ponytail was not going to help me. At all.
- Also at the volleyball game, there was one girl that was wearing a different color t-shirt from the rest of the team. Instead of a number, it said "Ingalls" on the back, so I assumed she had lost her uniform and was wearing a souvenir shirt from a "Little House on the Prairie" play or something. Then I saw the front and realized it was just a different uniform, and that "Ingalls" was actually her name.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Tattoos
One of my faithful readers (perhaps the only one remaining) has just e-mailed me for the second time in as many months asking for my blog address, again. She is apparently very embarrassed that she keeps losing it (as well she should be--one would think that someone who earns a living as an IT journalist would know how to bookmark a website!) and promises that she will never lose it again, because she's going to have the address tattooed on her left buttock.
So I thought that if she's willing to submit to bodily mutilation to be able to read my blog again, the least I can do is give her something new to read.
Here's a summary of the past month of my life:
- August 21: furniture and belongings finally delivered from France, after weeks of delays and annoying negotiations with French moving company and U.S. moving agent about whose fault it was that the shipment was stuck in the U.S. customs port for 10 days, incurring $1500 in additional storage costs, and who had to pay aforementioned costs. (Good news: it wasn't me!)
- August 22-25: unpacked bedding, so as to be able to start sleeping in my new apartment in St. Paul; moved most other belongings from temporary apartment in Minneapolis to permanent new place in St. Paul; waited in vain for my passport and West Africa visa to arrive from DC in time for my scheduled August 24 departure for West Africa; had to delay trip 2 days; do not unpack any boxes (except aforementioned bedding).
- August 26-September 6: go to West Africa (see two previous posts); get dysentery.
- September 7-12: return to St. Paul for a business conference; recover from dysentery; prepare for trip to North Africa; do not unpack any boxes.
- September 13: get phone call from mother at 7 a.m. (confusedly try to answer cell phone on nightstand, pulling charger out of plug and flinging cell phone across room before realizing that it's actually the fixed line ringing in the other room) to tell me that my father is hospitalized with acute pancreatitis. Spend day waiting to hear how serious it is, to determine whether I should delay trip to North Africa. Also discover car is leaking oil, so scurry to find trustworthy garage open on Saturday in new hometown and try to decide if should leave car in garage while away or must keep car to rush to Mankato if father is seriously ill. Or maybe shouldn't drive to Mankato in car leaking oil. Or if father not too ill, need car to drive to friends' joint birthday party that night. But really should get car fixed while away. And so on with decision loop until news arrives that father will be okay, just needs gall bladder removed; I should go to North Africa; I find car garage open on Saturday and leave car there and friends drive me to party; do not unpack any boxes.
- September 14-19: go to North Africa; do not get dysentery; call mother on Tuesday, hear that father is doing well, she promises to let me know if any changes; call mother on Thursday, find out father has been in ICU since Tuesday night (she didn't call because she "didn't want to worry" me) due to seizure, chest cavity filled with blood, collapsed lung, other badness; she assures me father will be okay now; get off phone and decide that it's stupid to remain in North Africa on Friday when only have one meeting scheduled, so call travel agent and get departure moved from Saturday the 20th to Friday the 19th; arrive at MSP at 10 p.m. on Friday. (Note to self: for future trips, if have choice, will always choose to have dysentery myself rather than father with blood-filled chest cavity.)
- September 20-21 and beyond: in Mankato, sitting with father and family at hospital. Dad got out of ICU on Friday evening and is gradually getting better. We're still waiting for the inflammation of his pancreas to go down (extra credit to those of you taking Biology this semester: please describe the location and function of the pancreas, or simply donate your own for my father's use), and then they'll remove his gall bladder. Maybe later this week, or maybe he'll come home for a few weeks and then go back in for the surgery.
For the time being, my boxes remained packed and piled in unnavigable and teetering towers in my new apartment. But they'll get unpacked eventually (maybe by Christmas?!). They're not going anywhere, and neither am I. Right now, I'm glad to be living in Minnesota, right where my family needs me to be.
I might even be willing to get that tattooed on my left buttock.
So I thought that if she's willing to submit to bodily mutilation to be able to read my blog again, the least I can do is give her something new to read.
Here's a summary of the past month of my life:
- August 21: furniture and belongings finally delivered from France, after weeks of delays and annoying negotiations with French moving company and U.S. moving agent about whose fault it was that the shipment was stuck in the U.S. customs port for 10 days, incurring $1500 in additional storage costs, and who had to pay aforementioned costs. (Good news: it wasn't me!)
- August 22-25: unpacked bedding, so as to be able to start sleeping in my new apartment in St. Paul; moved most other belongings from temporary apartment in Minneapolis to permanent new place in St. Paul; waited in vain for my passport and West Africa visa to arrive from DC in time for my scheduled August 24 departure for West Africa; had to delay trip 2 days; do not unpack any boxes (except aforementioned bedding).
- August 26-September 6: go to West Africa (see two previous posts); get dysentery.
- September 7-12: return to St. Paul for a business conference; recover from dysentery; prepare for trip to North Africa; do not unpack any boxes.
- September 13: get phone call from mother at 7 a.m. (confusedly try to answer cell phone on nightstand, pulling charger out of plug and flinging cell phone across room before realizing that it's actually the fixed line ringing in the other room) to tell me that my father is hospitalized with acute pancreatitis. Spend day waiting to hear how serious it is, to determine whether I should delay trip to North Africa. Also discover car is leaking oil, so scurry to find trustworthy garage open on Saturday in new hometown and try to decide if should leave car in garage while away or must keep car to rush to Mankato if father is seriously ill. Or maybe shouldn't drive to Mankato in car leaking oil. Or if father not too ill, need car to drive to friends' joint birthday party that night. But really should get car fixed while away. And so on with decision loop until news arrives that father will be okay, just needs gall bladder removed; I should go to North Africa; I find car garage open on Saturday and leave car there and friends drive me to party; do not unpack any boxes.
- September 14-19: go to North Africa; do not get dysentery; call mother on Tuesday, hear that father is doing well, she promises to let me know if any changes; call mother on Thursday, find out father has been in ICU since Tuesday night (she didn't call because she "didn't want to worry" me) due to seizure, chest cavity filled with blood, collapsed lung, other badness; she assures me father will be okay now; get off phone and decide that it's stupid to remain in North Africa on Friday when only have one meeting scheduled, so call travel agent and get departure moved from Saturday the 20th to Friday the 19th; arrive at MSP at 10 p.m. on Friday. (Note to self: for future trips, if have choice, will always choose to have dysentery myself rather than father with blood-filled chest cavity.)
- September 20-21 and beyond: in Mankato, sitting with father and family at hospital. Dad got out of ICU on Friday evening and is gradually getting better. We're still waiting for the inflammation of his pancreas to go down (extra credit to those of you taking Biology this semester: please describe the location and function of the pancreas, or simply donate your own for my father's use), and then they'll remove his gall bladder. Maybe later this week, or maybe he'll come home for a few weeks and then go back in for the surgery.
For the time being, my boxes remained packed and piled in unnavigable and teetering towers in my new apartment. But they'll get unpacked eventually (maybe by Christmas?!). They're not going anywhere, and neither am I. Right now, I'm glad to be living in Minnesota, right where my family needs me to be.
I might even be willing to get that tattooed on my left buttock.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
My Fabulous Jet-Setting Life
I'm back in Paris' Charles de Gaulle airport (I think this is my 4th post from here--please can I just write "CDG" and trust that my readers are sufficiently cosmopolitan to understand) and was all set to taunt you with the fabulousness of my life: the food poisoning followed by days of an all toast-and-Sprite diet, the hours of waiting in a hot and humid airport for a midnight flight, the night spent in a cramped seat praying for it all to be over, followed by my morning ablutions in an airport bathroom (I washed my face with hand soap and then realized that the airport roller towel was jammed and I was going to have to dry my face on a soggy and previously used bit of cloth). But they've started boarding my 7? 8? hour flight to JFK, which will be followed by a 3-hour flight MSP.
I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to doing this all over again a week from tomorrow, when I leave for North Africa! I'd be glad to trade this glamourous life for two straight weeks at home to start unpacking the boxes from my move. OK, I'm off to sit in a teeny tiny seat some more.
P.S. This morning, at the airport snack stand, I discovered that the correct English translation of croissant is apparently "milk-bread pastry." I just thought you should know!
I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to doing this all over again a week from tomorrow, when I leave for North Africa! I'd be glad to trade this glamourous life for two straight weeks at home to start unpacking the boxes from my move. OK, I'm off to sit in a teeny tiny seat some more.
P.S. This morning, at the airport snack stand, I discovered that the correct English translation of croissant is apparently "milk-bread pastry." I just thought you should know!
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